“THE doctor said I’ve the heart of a 30-year-old,” boasted 32-year-old David Dunne to his wife Jan, with all the air of someone in their late 80s and dying of a terminal disease, “cholesterol a little over but he said it was grand and to just pare back on the butter and salt”. Dreading his… Read more »
ONE LOCAL lean, mean fitness machine has been on the receiving end of significant praise for his ability to just get on with his intensive exercise routine without making it his entire personality. Mark Tierney (25) is to be given a coveted award from the Irish Society of Fair Play To You for his decision… Read more »
ORIGINALLY bought as some sort of exercise regime or weight training program or something or other, the kettlebell sat in the home of Dublin man Cathal McHogan has proved to be an incredibly useful thing to have about the house, WWN can report. “It’s mad, I don’t even remember buying them!” laughed the 37-year-old, pushing… Read more »
FRIENDS and acquaintances of Dublin man Jeremy Hayes have today staged an intervention for the jogging enthusiast over his continued tirade of absolute shite talk while running, calling on him to just take the time to casually chat now and again and enjoy the moment. Hellbent on proving how fit he is by continually waffling,… Read more »
GRIMACING as if hearing the snapping of a distant twig under the footfall of an elite team of US Marshals tasked with bringing him in, local Waterford man Denis Laffin can’t help but let his imagination run wild with thoughts of what it would like to be a fugitive from the law like in a… Read more »
A MAN endeavouring to kick start his New Year fitness regime has been surrounded by a rapid pack of wild personal trainers, WWN has learned. With gyms closed for the foreseeable future it is believed Ireland now has some 100,000 personal trainers left with no option but to operate in the wild, something local man… Read more »
A COUNTY Waterford gym has issued a notice today asking members to charge their music devices before their scheduled gym appointments following one of several cancellations citing uncharged airpods, WWN has learned. “What’s the fucking point if I can’t listen to tunes?” defended MeatHeads Gym member, Derek Stapleton, who only realised his airpods weren’t charged… Read more »
FIT people and sort-of fit people alike shared tears of joy outside the Court Of Human Rights in Strasbourg today, after a landmark ruling which outlawed the notorious ‘burpee’ exercise after decades of misery and sore arses. The court took less than ten minutes to declare the half-squat, half-plank exercise to be a gross incursion… Read more »
WITH IRISH gyms reopening, many fitness fanatics were unsure if their gym would be a safe place to workout. Well, WWN is sad to report, that gym lovers have their answer in the tragic case of one Waterford man, Darren Carmody. Following his new gym’s health and safety protocols to the letter of the law… Read more »
SINCE the covid-19 lockdown over five weeks ago, many people have discovered a whole new world of exercise with a large majority of people opting to simply put one leg in front of another, a routine commonly known as walking. Technically a simple routine for most, walking during social distancing has thrown a spanner in… Read more »