Tag: dublin

Met Éireann Confirm Current Fog Is 90% Vape

A SPOKESPERSON for the Met office has confirmed that the dense fog currently coating the country is a result of high amounts of vape smoke, probably due to New Years smoking resolutions. Currently at an Orange Warning level, the country is experiencing thick clouds of mist reducing visibility significantly on all major routes, which meteorologists… Read more »

Woman Enters 25th Year Of Pretending To Be A Lesbian

LOCAL woman Marie Finlan is reported to be sticking with her pretense of being a lesbian after a quarter of a century, according to sources in her small, rural hometown. Having initiated her ‘lesbian phase’ in the early nineties after returning from trying to be cool while attending college in Dublin, Waterford local Finlan was expected to… Read more »

Nobody Shot In Dublin Today [UPDATED]

FOLLOWING months of gangland violence that has produced an ever-heightening pile of bodies, WWN can report that nobody has been shot in Dublin today. The whole day passed without incident, fostering a feeling that the guards were in control of the situation, and that human life still had value in the city. With no bullets… Read more »