Husband’s Annual Half-Arsed Tidy Of House Underway

A MAJOR undertaking on a scale never before witnessed throughout the course of human history is currently unfolding at 44 Glenmare Court, Waterford. Burning as many as 11 calories during his half-arsed minutes-long attempts at cleaning the house Alan Kearnans is that rare beast; a man with a slavish devotion to keeping a tidy house…. Read more »

Friend Issues Terrifying Offer Of Night Out

THINK you have problems? Count yourself lucky that you aren’t 43-year-old Waterford man Phil MacLoone, who earlier today received a chilling text from one of his pals hinting at a possible piss-up in the pair’s near future. “Once you pass 40, you’d rather get a letter from Revenue saying there’s some irregularities with your accounts… Read more »

19-Year-Old Sessioner Urged To Take It Easy

DANCING to music that wasn’t playing and smoking an imagined cigarette no one gave him, 19-year-old sessioner Niall Clatten is being urged to ‘take it easy’ by concerned friends. “This is the thing, you can take the partying when you’re younger. The body’s a curious thing – it recovers,” said Clatten with a voice of… Read more »