Confusion As Trump Seals Iran Peace Deal To End War He Said Wasn’t A War, Was Already Over, Would Result In Iran’s Complete Surrender & Reopen Strait That Only Closed Because He Attacked Nation

US PRESIDENT Donald Trump has been celebrating his claims of a cast iron permanent peace deal with Iran, causing considerable confusion among American citizens and others around the world, WWN understands.

“Wait, I thought wars that weren’t wars, that were won on day one through almighty military might don’t need or require a peace deal?” shared one confused American, who has lived through over 8 dozen separate claims and announcements of the end of the war with Iran since it started on the 28th of February.

“Who is there to negotiate with? I thought according to his Truth Social posts, there’s nothing left of anything there?” added another weary American.

The peace deal is considered a crowning achievement of the Trump presidency by luminaries such as Donald Trump, a high point in the history of international diplomacy.

“As was always the case, my sole desire in this war was to see the Strait Hormuz reopened, something that only closed after I and Bibi attacked Iran,” explained Trump, “you idiots don’t get it, you wouldn’t know victory if it hit you in the face; victory is unfreezing $24bn in assets belonging to the country you said you defeated over 100 days ago and allowing them to implement a highly lucrative toll in Hormuz”.

“Now if a little peace prize board happens to be listening, wouldn’t it be a perfect gesture, the best gesture, to give a little somebody a peace prize on his birthday, recognising all this hard work to end a war I started?” added Trump, visibly begging.

UPDATE: early indications are that Benjamin Netanyahu’s Israeli government has said ‘nah, fuck that’ when it comes to a peace deal framework.