Bless, These Kids Think Self-Centred Politicians Will Actually Listen To Them

A CROWD of young people staging a protest outside the Dáil have been labeled ‘narcissistic naive eejits’ by older generations.

“‘Oh look at me, I’m young and concerned about having nowhere to live, ongoing unjust wars and the planet’s ecosystem falling apart’. You honestly think politicians care about that shit?” said a member of the public who once stupidly believed in their capacity to change things too.

Handmade signs with alarmist and witty slogans aplenty, the youngsters foolishly made an appeal to politicians to act now before it’s too late and to look deep within their consciences.

“Sorry, a what?” a spokesperson for the coalition said in response to a call to action.

Making sure to talk down to the crowd, the spokesperson confirmed that the government was open to distracting them from missing every climate, housing and health target with stuff like extending free contraception.

“You guys are young, just enjoy your youth like I did and stand for election in your dad’s old seat when you’re handpicked by a political party,” added a politician, who thinks young people are our most precious resource but at the same time just shut up.

Politicians issued a collective statement apologising if they gave the impression that they cared what young people had to say before clarifying that they were just in it for the pension and the post-TD career boost and lucrative lobbying gig.