Commercial Property Run Down, Lacking Basic Facilities? Why Not Convert It To A Direct Provision Centre Today

DO YOU own some dilapidated commercial buildings and want to make a quick buck while also getting the local council off your back? How about applying to be a Direct Provision centre and make an absolute killing today with Direct Provision Centres 4 You!

For 20 years Direct Provision centres have become the go-to revenue stream of choice for run-down hotel and B&B owners with extraordinarily little regulation and oversight from the Irish government. Is not bothering to repaint your old property and hiring in some low-paid, underqualified workers to run a halfway house for refugees fleeing persecution and war really worth it?

Don’t ask us, ask our agents of misery working in the field.

“I had a run-down hotel that went bust in the recession and now I’m a multimillionaire!” said one lucky Direct Provision Centres 4 You agent we spoke to today, who is now going to expand after buying another shitty B&B, “I guess this must be what private jail owners in the US must feel like, cha-ching!”

With over 7,600 refugees to choose from, you too could be one of the lucky 39 Direct Provision centres in Ireland who have collectively pocketed €1 billion of public money to convert their property sites into detention centres, with some making €100 million each from housing asylum seekers!

That’s right, much like similar private companies like Millstreet Equestrian Services in Cork, you too could make up to €8.6 million per year from the Irish government who pay refugees just €38.80 each per week to be incarcerated for years on end until eventually the immigration department plucks their proverbial fingers out from their civil servant holes.

“I travelled in the back of a container where I lost my daughter to exhaustion,” said one happy DP customer, who has been living in a box room with a non-relation for 7 years now, “I’m depressed and I just want to kill myself, please process my application”.

Why not give it a go by contacting Direct Provision Centres 4 You on 1800-000-shame and profit from other people’s misery today!

NOTE: Direct Provision Centres 4 You will not be held accountable for any future compensation, redress schemes over the treatment of refugees, staff or personal injury claims. Terms and poor conditions apply.