Guide To Pretending You Don’t Know Who Stormy Daniels Is

RUMOURS surrounding the details of a supposed affair between President Donald Trump and pornstar Stormy Daniels have thrown up significant problems for both the White House and boyfriends and husbands who have to pretend they’ve never heard of the XXX star.

Just as Trump is denying all knowledge of the illicit affair, men around the world are denying all knowledge of Ms. Daniels extensive back catalogue. If this is the case with you, you may find the following tips helpful:

1) “What kind of name is Stormy?”

Should the subject come up in conversation with your wife or girlfriend, immediately steer the conversation in a direction you can control. The easiest thing to do is simply mock the stage name of the actress, and create a conversation about how sex workers tend to use names like superheroes. From here you can kick off a chat about upcoming Marvel movies, and avoid the risk of accidentally blurting out that you were watching clips of Ms. Daniels in action just minutes ago.

2) Say that Trump is doing a great job

“He may have had an affair, but he’s doing wonders for the US economy right now”… this is enough to send your partner into a rage at your misguided political views, which although uncomfortable is still preferable to the conversation leading to you revealing your porn addiction.

3) Remember your training

This is not the first time a porn star has entered mainstream media, so just remember how you tackled the death of August Ames and Shyla Styles, and how you remained completely straight faced when Sasha Grey showed up on Entourage. You can do this pal! We have every faith in you!