Horror As Mike Pence Visits Ireland Without Supping Pint Of Guinness


IRELAND and the United States stand on the brink of an international showdown following the news that Vice President Mike Pence made a stop-over in Shannon Airport without partaking in any of the traditional activities of a visiting politician, such as sipping a fresh pint of Guinness or having a go at playing hurling.

The Irish Association For Welcoming Lads (IAWL) only learned of Pence’s visit to Shannon when the VP posted a tweet about how he met US troops who had also stopped off at the Clare airport on Saturday morning, before boarding Air Force 2 and continuing on to meetings in the Middle East.

Sources close to the IAWL have confirmed that the mood in the committee has been one of extreme anger, with many calling for an end to Ireland’s ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ approach to the US warplanes that land in Shannon Airport as a punishment for Pence not at least raising a pint of the black stuff.

“Obama knew the deal” said James Garnon, spokesperson for the IAWL, taking a 5-minute break from being fucking furious.

“Like every president before him, we let him land planes in and out of Shannon without any questions, just as long as he came and had a pint and maybe met some gobshite distant relative along the way. But Pence thinks he can use Shannon as a US Air Force base and not even puck a few sliotairs around on the tarmac while we photograph the shit out of him? No fucking chance, Mickey Boy”.

Although the IAWL are ‘calling for blood’ on the matter, the government have advised them to keep quiet and ‘not upset the Americans’ as this might upset Leo Varadkar’s first St. Patrick’s Day trip to Washington.