Ryanair To Sell €2 Tickets For Hanging Meat Hook Spaces

RYANAIR has announced its plans to run flights where passengers are hung on meat hooks during the journey at a cost of just €2 per ticket.

Ryanair’s CEO, Michael O’Leary, has been quoted as saying “We’ve been looking into meat hooks for a long long time. We would be taking out the last 20 rows of seats and replacing them with 60 rows of meat hook spaces were passengers will be hung up right by the scruff of the neck.”

The hanging area will be placed at the back of its fleet of 250 planes.

The European safety board have responded to the idea of meat hooks saying that it is unlikely that European safety regulators would approve of such a concept.

Chairman of the board, Ingrid Pontowl said today “The passengers would have to be secured to the cabin floor. It is not just a case of hanging them and leaving them there. Swinging back and forth during turbulence could pose huge problems with the health and safety of other passengers and crew. We would need to investigate this further before we are likely to know how to proceed.”

Aircraft manufacturer Boeing has already rejected Ryanair’s controversial plan, but the airline says it has re-entered talks with the company after a ‘financial issue’ was ironed out.

Mr. O’Leary also stated that there would have to be a €1 ‘hanging charge’ if the passenger was not able to hang themselves on the hook.

A Ryanair spokeswoman said that 400 new jobs would be created if the plan were to go ahead: “Two extra cabin crew per plane would be needed to facilitate the hanging of the passengers.”

The spokeswoman also dismissed claims that the company is only seeking publicity and is not serious about any proposals it makes.

She added: “The same claims were made two years ago when we announced that we would remove all our check-in desks from airports across the continent. And look what happened there, we removed the last check-in desk in October last year. So there. Ha!”