Tag: ge2020

Putin Not Arsed Interfering In Irish Election

RUSSIA’S benevolent leader Vladimir Putin has expressed his disinterest in interfering in the upcoming Irish election, despite his obvious interest in destabilising the West. Senior KGB agents, unrivalled in the field of sowing the seeds of discontent in democracies, had recently presented Putin with a 24 inch thick dossier on Ireland with endless recommendations for… Read more »

Leo Varadkar’s Guide To The 2020 Election

REMAINING coy on the exact date for this year’s general election, Taoiseach Leo Varadkar spoke to WWN and helpfully divulged some details which will be of use to the electorate ahead of what experts are calling ‘surely the most disappointing array of politicians’ on record: – Unhappy with the current state of public services? The… Read more »

Student Going Through Sinn Féin Phase

UCD student Trevor O’Brien is to spend the coming months learning off and adopting the key political ideology of Sinn Féin, in what many people presume is just a phase that every student goes through at some point. “It used to be Labour in my day, but students are wise to them now. I was… Read more »

Facetuning Your Election Poster: A Guide

RUNNING in the upcoming elections for the first time or looking regain your seat? Either way, it’s time to get your mug on every lamppost in the area! But in the age of HD photography and printing, the standard quarter-turn ‘look over the shoulder, smile but don’t show too many teeth look’ just ain’t gonna cut it… Read more »

How To Draw The Perfect Penis On Your Ballot Paper

As part of WWN’s extensive coverage of the general election we are addressing the issue of spoiling your vote. Many disgruntled and disillusioned voters will choose to arrive at a polling station only to spoil their vote. Political commentators see it as a controversial step to take, sighting the act as a slight on those… Read more »