Tag: ge2020

Labour Party Put Ad In Paper For Grave Digger

FOLLOWING on from Brendan Howlin’s resignation as party leader the Labour party have wasted no time in finding a suitable successor and will now seek to appoint a grave digger to finish off the job believed to have been initially undertaken in 2011. “We need someone with the relevant experience to ensure this hole we’ve… Read more »

McDonald Dons Hazmat Suit To Avoid Contracting Fiannafáilvirus During Negotiations

TAKING EVERY necessary precaution during nascent government coalition talks with Fianna Fáil, Sinn Féin leader Mary Lou McDonald is currently being placed in a highly secure hazmat suit, to give her a fighting chance against catching the devastating Fiannafáilvirus. Such is the panic and paranoia around the all-consuming infection, the phone with which McDonald used… Read more »

Unified Ireland: The Big Questions

ALTHOUGH a new government has yet to be formed from the aftermath of GE2020, a freshly-invigorated and triumphant Sinn Féin have already begun to lay the groundwork for a Unity Referendum; an all-island poll to gauge the desire to finally reunite Northern Ireland with the Republic, a question that has been brewing in the four… Read more »

WWN Looks At All The Possible Coalition Options

AS IS TRADITION now in Irish elections none of the the biggest parties are anywhere close to having enough seats to rule on their own, so the Irish public will watching closely as parties begin negotiations over potential coalition formations. How do the numbers work and what realistic combinations gets the country closest to a… Read more »

DUP Admit They Could ‘Do Without This Shit’

DUP leader Arlene Foster has taken to drinking Gaviscon straight out of the bottle this week, following a series of events that have caused her party ‘nothing but grief’, including the stunning general election performance of Sinn Féin in the Republic. Crucified with the heartburn and getting by on less than three hours sleep a… Read more »