DESPITE overseeing for-profit illegal adoptions which ripped children away from their mothers who they placed in indentured servitude, religious order Sisters of Charity was surprised by the absence of a ticker tape parade in their honour after they announced the transfer of lands at St. Vincent’s Hospital to the Irish state. “You’re probably all just… Read more »
PLAUDITS are continuing to pour into the UK from nations around the world, with governments thanking Boris and the Tories for providing a reliable source of Coronavirus statistics and strategies that make their own seem ‘not so bad’. “We were really looking bad there for a minute” said Italian Prime Minister Giuseppe Conte, as the… Read more »
THE FORMAL ANNOUNCEMENT that students of this year’s Leaving Cert will receive ‘calculated grades’ or sit exams at a later date has been welcomed by all teachers whose favourite phrase is ‘you’ll amount to nothing’, WWN can confirm. While the ongoing global pandemic has created an endless variety of complex problems that have unbelievably easy… Read more »
DESPITE desperate pleas with the government to act, a helpless nation was left to watch on as over 10,000 Covid-19 infected bats passed through Dublin airport without the proper checks. Since the Aer Lingus Wuhan to Dublin flight via New York, Madrid, London and Rome landed this morning, social media has been flooded with disturbing… Read more »
AS SHE awaits a new update this afternoon on the final fate of this year’s Leaving Cert examinations, one Waterford mother has admitted to absolutely living for every minute of being able to make the maximum amount of fuss while spiralling down an anxiety filled black hole. “Margaret! My poor Joshua doesn’t know what to… Read more »
REVENUE are continuing to crack down hard on illegal smuggling into Ireland, and with the added time on their hands they’ve been able to come up with some interesting and unique ways to punish those they catch. A team of four men who attempted to smuggle 8.4 million cigarettes into Dublin port in a refrigerated… Read more »
STRESSING that they were never keen going up or down to Dublin in the first place, the news of the closure of Bewley’s Cafe on Grafton Street and the loss of 110 jobs has removed the last, preciously tolerable part of Dublin, culchies have confirmed. “Ah shite, that cesspit of stress, rudeness and Notions Olympics… Read more »
WITH a programme for government set to be discussed by Fianna Fáil, Fine Gael and the Green Party on Thursday, WWN has gained unprecedented access to potential future policies, ‘red lines’ and inter-party disagreements. Just what will eco-friendly austerity and brown hemp envelopes involve? Ryan, trying to avoid a repeat of 2008 when The Green… Read more »
A CONDITION long swept under the carpet by Ireland, owing to the difficult questions that arise, the finger pointing and the recriminations. However, now, for the first time people are coming forward and going public their struggles of living with BIHS or Big Irish Head Syndrome. “I was on a meditation retreat in Tibet on… Read more »
EVERYTHING appears to have worked out nicely for Waterford Junior cert student Michael Hallington, who entered 2020 not giving a fiddler’s about the examinations and who now looks set to coast through a nice easy summer of doing fuck all. Hallington is among thousands of young teenagers who will receive ‘certificates of completion’ instead of… Read more »
