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Electric Ireland: Price Hikes Unavoidable As ‘Electricity Pole Crops’ Fall Victim To Wet Summer
ENERGY provider Electric Ireland (formally ESB) announced today that a new 6% increase in electricity prices was ‘unavoidable’ due to a ... -
High Court Considering ‘On The Spot Fines’ For Sexual Assault Cases Involving Rich Businessmen
THE IRISH high court today said it is considering ‘on the spot fines’ for all sexual assault cases brought against ... -
‘That’s Not What Your Mother Said Last Night’, Claims Friend Of Dublin Man
A LONG time friend of Dublin man James Dunphy claimed earlier that a comment made during a conversation at the ... -
Death Of Young Woman Even More Tragic Now That She Was ‘A Fine Thing’
THE untimely death of 21-year-old Jessica Harris last Tuesday evening was said to be even ‘more tragic now’ after images ... -
Millions Of Odd Socks Also Discovered In Large Hadron Collider, Claim Scientists
HUNDREDS of millions of odd socks were said to be among just some of the strange items discovered in the large Hadron ... -
Annoying Bastard Ice-Cream Van Guy ‘Taking The Absolute Piss Now’, Says Everybody
EVERYBODY living in housing estates across the country have claimed the annoying bastard ice-cream van guy is just ‘taking the absolute piss now’, it ... -
Astronomy Ireland: ‘Venus Can Go Fuck Itself’
ONE of the countries most popular astronomy clubs announced today that it was sick and tired of failing to see ... -
Drinking Coffee Makes You Live Longer Until We Change Our Minds Again, Say Researchers
PEOPLE who drink coffee live longer than non-drinkers, but researchers may change their minds again next week, a special report ... -
Theory on ‘Invisible’ Dark Matter Which Holds Universe Together Is ‘Absolute fairytale’, Says Pope
THE POPE has laughed-off sciences latest theory on ‘dark matter’, saying that the idea of an invisible force that holds ... -
Vatican Strikes D’Arcy Family Name From Church Register
THE VATICAN have announced today that anyone with the family name ‘D’Arcy’ will be stricken from all Catholic church records ...