Woman Takes Out Second Mortgage Ahead Of Taylor Swift Gigs

NEWS that Taylor Swift is bringing her ‘Eras’ tour to Dublin could be enough to keep a brutal recession at bay, as tens of thousands of Swifties ready themselves to pump more money into the economy in two days than they would normally spend in two years.

Credit Union loan applications soared this week following the announcement of the Aviva concerts, with some people like Waterford woman Sheila Manning going so far as to re-mortgage her house to help finance the eye-watering cost of going for a night out in Dublin.

“The tickets themselves are a scandalous price, but it’s the supplementary gouging that will really sting. Everyone is hiking their prices. I’ll be surprised if they don’t double the cost of the M50 toll,” Manning told us, as she readied herself for the pure carnage that is buying tickets on Ticketmaster.

“500 quid for a hotel room that’s normally 150, a tenner for a hotdog, a fiver for bottle of water; it will be worth it to see Taylor Swift live in concert while also knowing that I’m playing my part in helping the economy limp on for another 8 months before collapsing into fiscal ruin for another decade”.

Given the price of attending the gig, Irish fans have warned Swift that she had better play all the hits and not this ‘here’s something from the new album’ bullshit.