New Study Finds Old Study Was Talking Through Its Arse

A NEW study published today has ruthlessly torn a previous study to shreds for ‘talking through it arse’.

The cold academic language came in the wake of a study of germination period for tomato seeds in extreme weather conditions where slugs are present.

“Specifically the Limax cinereoniger slug and let me tell you, those fucking knuckleheads who published that 2016 study are talking through their holes, then fed back through their own holes to do some more talking out of their holes,” shared biologist Dr. Emma Tierney, who is part of a growing trend of gang-like beefs between competing scientists and their studies.

“Look, I wouldn’t be as harsh as Emma there, but purely using biology parlance that study from 2016 can suck my fucking balls,” added Dr. Tierney’s colleague, Dr. Amy Crofton.

New studies contradicting, amending or improving upon previous studies is par the course for research and academia at large as a more advanced and nuanced understanding of subjects emerge, however, the group responsible for this study show no signs of letting up on discrediting their peers.

“Does you mom know she gave birth to a giant shit? You know you’re the first turd I’ve seen given a human name, Kevin,” Dr. Tierney shouted as author of the now outdated study, Dr. Kevin Markey, sobbed and curled up in the foetal position in an attempt to protect himself.