Local Man Can Get You A Dodgy Box Just Say The Word

APPEARING OUT of nowhere and immediately beginning a conversation about black market digital TV boxes unprompted, local man Graham Fillan confirms you only have to ask.

“It has the works, you love a bit of sport don’t ya? This has all the Prem games. Granted, with Arabic commentary but you’re never too old to learn a new language, 1 pixel resolution” confirmed Fillan, who added no drilling for cables would be needed for installation but if you need insulation or plasterboard he does that too.

“I’ve a box out in the car. You’ll take it, your missus would love it – has all the latest romantic comedies from the US which actually all end up being anti-abortion films somehow. You strike me as a Guatemalan reality TV channel fan, am I right? This thing has hundreds of them,” enthused Fillan further.

The variety doesn’t stop there, Fillan’s one stop shop digibox also has channels dedicated to the Malaysian stock market and 47 channels just for dogs, however, if you have a friend who might want one never use Fillan’s real name.

“Now just be careful with the kids channels, no don’t worry they’re brilliant – all the cartoons the little dotes could want. It’s just if you don’t update the box at precisely 3.14am every spring equinox in summer and autumn the kids channels sort of cut out occasionally and turn into a live feed of Pornhub,” clarified Fillan, who added only a mug would have second thoughts about purchasing one.