We Tried These Celebrity Alcohol Brands And Now What Are You Looking At? Do You Want Your Fucking Go?
THE release of Mariah Carey’s new Irish creme liqueur ‘Black Irish’ has inspired WWN to take an afternoon to sample the many different celebrity-endorsed spirits now on the market. We skipped lunch to do this, so let’s see how we get on!
1) Mariah Carey’s ‘Black Irish’ liqueur
A nod to Carey’s Cork-by-way-of-Venezuela ancestry, the Baileys-esque drink is nice and smooth and should be perfect for anyone’s mum to drink half a bottle of on St. Stephen’s Day.
2) Conor McGregor’s Proper 12
Against the advice of many of the more sensible members of the writing staff, we follow the Baileys with a shot of McGregor’s whiskey. We feel we should say that we like this, lest we receive a box to the side of the head from the man himself.
3) Dan Aykroyd’s Crystal Skull vodka
The Ghostbuster himself has done a good job with this vodka, and the glass skull it comes in looks deadly on anyone’s desk. It’s a pretty smooth vodka, we think. We mixed it with Aldi brand Red Bull and that’s all we can taste.
4) Ryan Reynold’s Aviation gin
Look, we’re just having a good time ok? Just having some of Deadpool’s fucking gin here, alright? Why give us this assignment and then tell us to slow down halfway through it. ‘You know how you get’, no we don’t know how we get, how do we get? Tell us how we get.
5) Tequila (possibly from The Rock)
It’s tequila alright, whether or not Dwayne Johnson had a hand in making it or not remains to be seen. What we do know is that the accounts department would want to stop looking at us like that unless they want their fucking go.
6) Tequila from the rock
That last shot tasted like another, in fact, just leave the bottle there.
7) Almond infused cognac made by the hairy kid from Stranger Things
Well, it could be for all we know. Here, let’s get out of here, this place is fucking dead, too many doses around that wouldn’t know a session if it fell on them. Y’wha? Say that again, dare ya! Right, let’s hear ya say that after we skull ya with this glass skull.