WWN SPORTS can confirm categorically that the 2020 Tokyo Olympics has in fact come to a close, and there is no need for anyone to call their satellite or cable provider to complain about why there’s no more sport on their telly.
“It wrapped up early on Sunday morning, you probably missed it because you were hungover, or too busy with the Kellie Harrington celebrations” said an Olympic official today, after thousands of emails from Ireland asking where all the running went.
The news that the Olympics was in fact finished came first as a surprise to many, before disappointment and indeed anger began to set in.
“Ah here, why did they finish it just when we were getting the hang of it? We had another three or four medals in us, easy” moaned one Waterford man we spoke to.
“But wait, it can’t be over, there wasn’t even any long jump, discus, pole vault, or any of that” added another woman, who had clearly missed the long jump, discus, pole vault, and ‘or any of that’.
“I’d a great time dismissing the efforts and abilities of some of the world’s greatest athletes on social media from my sofa while I ate cake and filled the room with farts, what am I supposed to do now?” groused thousands, who will now have to wait for a few weeks before the Premier League starts up again and they can get their fix of snideness.
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