‘Man With Temperature And Sore Throat’ And Other Costumes You Can Expect This Halloween


ALTHOUGH nobody has called for the cancellation of Halloween just yet, it’s becoming more apparent that this year’s spooky festivities will be very different from years gone by.

The new wave of medical terrors we’re living through are far scarier that any witch or horrifically-burned paedophile dream demon, so here’s a few costumes that you may find showing up at your door this year:

1) Non-social distancers

What could send a chill down the spine quite like a cluster of people less than 2m away from each other? This new terror will manifest itself in group costumes where people don’t even have to dress up; they can just wear their normal clothes and stand close together. “We’re passengers on the 39A”, one group might say. Chilling.

2) Tony Holo-man

The nation’s favourite boogeyman Tony Holohan should make for an excellent costume this year for those who are bald, or willing to go bald. Oooh, look, he’s coming to shut down your businesses and protect your lives! And he’s got Ronan Grymm with him! Fun for all the family, or at least whatever is left of it.

3) Asymptomatic Carrier

Although the less-imaginative out there will head off for Halloween dressed as an actual Covid-19 patient complete with sniffles and soaring temperature, those who prefer a subtly scary dress-up will simply go as a deadly asymptomatic carrier, feeling grand, not a bother. Watch as they infect your elderly parents! You’ll never believe that somebody you know actually gave you Covid-19! that’s against the rules, surely?

4) Zoom Quiz

It’s been the most dreaded thing all this year, and it’s sure to make an excellent Halloween costume; the fearful Zoom Quiz! Add a twist by making it a work Zoom quiz, with your boss and that dose you hate, all pretending to have a great time while sussing out what sort of house you live in.