Investigation Launched Into Who Tampered With The Thermostat Settings


GARDAÍ in Waterford have called on anyone passing Lismore Pines housing estate on Monday evening to report any suspicious activity around house number 79 after reports from the owner who found the settings on the family thermostat to have been drastically rearranged, WWN can report.

The alarm was raised at 6pm after dad Gerard Power returned home from work to find the heating to be off instead of on, despite carefully spending nearly ‘one fucking hour’ timing the thermostat to come on at peak times in the house, mostly when he was going to work, home or bed.

“It couldn’t have just changed its-fucking-self,” the irate father-of-four-sheepish-looking-children explained at a press conference inside the family home today, “I specifically remember pushing down the little white things on the dial so that the house would be nice and toasty by the time I got home from work at 6, but now the whole time is wrong and a load of the white things have been pressed down, like some maniac was messing around with it”.

Forensic teams confirmed that no ‘new fingerprints’ have been detected on the thermostat, pointing to either a gloved intruder, or someone closer to home.

“We’re investigating all lines of inquiry,” Garda Paul Monk told WWN, his eyes darting from family member to family member, “we’re looking into the possibility that the dial may have been turned at what appears to be 4pm, prime coming home from school time,” he added, as one of the Power children shifted awkwardly in their seat.

In an unrelated incident, two unwashed cups were also left upside down in the family sink and several damp towels left on the bathroom floor.