Trump Vows To Replace Ginsburg With Better Looking Woman
US PRESIDENT Donald Trump has expressed his admiration for the life and work of the late Supreme Court judge Ruth Bader Ginsburg, and vowed to replace her with someone with ‘a bit more junk in the trunk if you know what I mean’ by Friday, Saturday at the latest.
Although there were pleas for Trump to hold off on the nomination of a candidate that could swing the court in favour of Republicans for a generation, the president insisted that he would make sure to get one of the ‘many beautiful women I’ve known in my life’ in the vacant seat before the Democrats ‘get some dog in there’.
“Ruth Bader Ginsburg was a fine woman for many reasons, but looks-wise, on her best day, she was a six” said Trump at a tightly packed rally today, cheered on by thousands.
“And I would know – you’ve seen the women I’ve had, right? So many beautiful women. Ruth wouldn’t know about that because she was too busy working for women’s rights, which made it much harder for men to do lots of things. So, yeah, thanks for that Ruth. I’ll make sure we get a woman in there that knows when to keep quiet, right?”
Trump went on to suggest that his daughter Ivanka might be a good candidate for the role despite meeting none of the criteria, stressing that running a failed fashion business and being a judge were ‘about the same thing’.
“Plus we know she’s got it in the looks department” winked the president of the United States.