James Bond Moves To Dublin As Garda Bugging Gets Serious


Minister for Justice Alan Shatter is said to be ‘shocked and disturbed’ by news reports which claim shadowy MI6 operative James Bond is now living in Dublin, further fogging the clandestine air surrounding the GSOC bugging incident.

While misinformation and misrepresentation seem to be the only ever presents relating to the news that the offices of the Garda Ombudsman were infiltrated, the public’s assumption that confidential cases have found their way into the wrong hands now seem validated.

The appearance of Bond in Dublin has been reported mainly by tabloid newspapers and entertainment sites online leading people to question the reporting of news outlets such as RTÉ and The Irish Times who have been silent on the matter.

Opposition TDs have been critical of Shatter’s dismissal of the need for an independent inquiry into the alleged bugging and with this latest development that criticism is likely to increase.

It has been speculated that the Ombudsman’s offices were particularly vulnerable to security breaches carried out from rooftops, which resulted in a spy descending from the ceiling, never touching the floor.

“This calls into question the effectiveness of current security measures. Bond is widely known to be looking at houses in Dun Laoghaire with his wife and Shatter is there twiddling his thumbs,” offered security expert Maurice Killen.

Public outcry on the matter has increased too. “You’d always say the Government is an absolute joke, but then you have this lad Bond, a known MI6 guy swanning about and you don’t connect the dots. Resign is all I’ll say,” shared Dublin man Larry Price.

“James Bond? In Dublin, spying on the Gardaí? This is like the plot out of one those non-erotic and non-disturbing novels written by someone who isn’t Alan Shatter,” remarked disgusted Wicklow antive and mother-of-two Helen Grogan.