Man Moaning Online About Government Put In Charge For The Day

218
0
Share:

Galway man Eddie Drummond has finally been given a position he feels is befitting of his expertise and constant complaining, WWN can exclusively report.

A rare and presumably illegal executive order issued by Taoiseach Enda Kenny saw Eddie, a 34-year-old systems analyst, put in charge of the running of the entire country for a period of 24 hours.

Sources close to the Taoiseach revealed to WWN that after years of constant criticism issued by Eddie online via sites such as YouTube, Facebook, Twitter, the Journal and the Irish Times – the Fine Gael leader finally acquiesced and let Eddie have the reigns for a day.

For those currently reading this piece you will already be aware that within 5 minutes of the handover of power occurring Eddie had closed 40 Irish embassies due to his own ‘gut feeling’ and then proceeded to shut down all pubs ‘because we have a drink problem and it bloody needs addressing.’

Shortly after 11am Eddie announced a €1 billion stimulus package for those ‘shafted by the banker bastards’ which resulted in the quick and irrevocable collapse of the economy.

Eddie, while a momentarily popular leader, has evidently let the power get to him as he has just this minute, fired the entirety of ‘that shower in RTÉ’ replacing them with his mate Gary ‘who knows a thing or two about cameras’.

While WWN cannot confirm incoming reports that several buildings have inexplicably burst into flames as the fabric of Irish society disintegrates, it does appear Eddie’s 2009 claim in the comments section of an Irish Times article that he ‘couldn’t do worse then this lot of See You Next Tuesdays :P’ has come back to haunt him.

More to follow as we get it…

Share:
X