Tag: transport

Government Give Greenlight To ‘MetroLink Australia’ For Nation’s Emigrants

SEQUESTERING funding earmarked for the proposed Dublin MetroLink to the airport, the Department of Transport has decided to streamline the process by digging a MetroLink directly to Australia. “With 7 in 10 young people contemplating emigration because…well, have you looked around this place lately? This fact coupled with the impending recession we thought the OzTunnel… Read more »

‘Please Offer Me A Seat’ Badge Counteracted By ‘I Will In Me Hoop’ Forehead Tattoos

THE TRANSPORT Authority of Ireland have today launched a new badge and card for people with hidden disabilities to use when on public transport which is still expected to be no match for Ireland’s significant arsehole population. The initiative which is a simple and effective way for people with disabilities including fibromyalgia, autism, head injuries… Read more »

M50 Declared Best Place In Ireland To Meet Singles

AS more and more of Dublin’s bars, nightclubs and cultural hubs continue to close down to make way for hotels and offices, single people have found a new meeting-spot where they can try their hand at finding love; the M50 at rush hour. “It’s summer, it’s hot, we’re all sitting there in gridlock with our… Read more »

Aer Lingus 757 Appears Before Oireachtas Committee

FINALLY accepting calls to appear in front of the Oireachtas Committee, an Aer Lingus Boeing 757 attended a hearing this morning to discuss problems with flight cancellations, delays, and baggage handling issues, WWN has learned. The 250-seater aircraft faced a grueling grilling with questions from Transport Committee chairman Kieran O’Donnell. However the craft remained silent,… Read more »

Government Regrets Asking Man In Charge Of Fixing McDonalds Ice Cream Machine To Build Metrolink

THE coalition government has apologised for an ‘error in judgement’ in the procurement process relating the long delayed Metrolink project following revelations first reported by Waterford Whispers News. David Fennelly, chief ice cream machine maintenance engineer at fast food giant McDonalds had been awarded the lucrative contract to build and maintain the Metrolink but has… Read more »