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Irish Power Stations Advised To Take Batteries Out, Roll Around In Hand To Get Another ...
ROLLING blackouts may be prevented this winter if Ireland’s power stations stick to some tried-and-trusted methods of wringing as much ... -
When The Lights Go Out: A Guide
THE government has refused to offer any assurances or promises that the possibly upcoming energy shortages in winter will not ... -
Stay Warm This Winter By Burning Leaflets From Politicians Promising They’ll Sort Everything
SAVVY householders may be able to escape savage energy price hikes if they had the foresight to keep the easily ... -
News To Nation That You Weren’t Supposed To Put Soft Plastics In Recycling Before Now
“SHIT, so we weren’t supposed to be doing that for, let’s say, about the last two decades?” queried a slightly ... -
Climate Scientists Advise Storing Earth In A Cool, Dry Place Away From Direct Sunlight
ACCEPTING that political and business leaders seem incapable of embracing actual climate change measures which would prevent a warming of ... -
Robot Trees Overthrow Cork Masters Following Power Surge
BATTERED civilian soldiers in Cork city centre have made urgent appeals for reinforcements in their terrifying war against sentient robot ... -
“We Take Climate Change Seriously” Says Government Of Nation Covered In Data Centres
SEEKING to reassure the public after a damning UN backed IPCC report on climate change suggested drastic measures and decisive ... -
Greta Thunberg To Be Replaced With White Man In Hopes Climate Change Taken More Seriously
SWEDISH climate activist Greta Thunberg has been asked to ‘sit this one out’ following the publication of a terrifying new ... -
A Levy On Disposable Coffee Cups; Has The Government Just Solved Climate Change?
WITH just a handful of large corporations generating the vast majority of Co2 emissions and waste around the world, and ... -
Lads In Park Just Going To Leave Empty Cans Out For The Fairies To Tidy
HUNDREDS of empty cans, bottles, fast-food wrappers and other such general items of rubbish have disappeared overnight from Ireland’s parks, ...
