THE hugely popular [Restaurant Name Here] in [Location Here] has sadly announced its closure today after [Years In Business Here], WWN has learned.
Owner [Proprietor Name Here] cited the increase in energy bills and produce costs along with government inaction as to the reason for the closure and thanked all their customers who supported them over the years.
[Sad image of owners with staff who will all be bombarded with threatening social welfare letters to get a job in a few weeks]
[Emotional quote from cafe/bar/restaurant/shop owner outlining how the government watched on as a whole galaxy of financial hurdles continually tripped up any progress the business could make since scraping through Covid lockdowns with peanut aid before ruthless revenue sheriffs moved in and took all their kitchen equipment so they couldn’t even operate anymore]
[Restaurant Name Here] is one of thousands of businesses folding thanks to [Blame inflation caused by the war in Ukraine or whatever bullshit narrative it is at the time of writing here].
Meanwhile, [end with some good news about an Aldi or a Wetherspoons opening in the area to balance out the article so local politicians don’t get on our case saying we’re biased when it comes to accurate reporting].