Could Storing Cow Farts In Bags And Sending Them To Space Save The Planet?


SCIENTISTS at Trinity College Dublin have today successfully sent over 4 thousand methane filled bags of cow flatulence into space, which they believe could be the way forward in tackling climate change in farming rich nations.

The team of researchers travelled to county Tipperary this week where they have begun harvesting bovine emissions with second hand plastic shopping bags before tieing them at the end and then releasing them into the atmosphere. 

“We were dubious at first,” lead researcher Seamus MacPants told WWN when we visited the experiment this morning, “but once the bags were filled, the lighter than air gas did its own work and floated right up to the outer atmosphere before popping and releasing the harmful gas into space, where it is quickly and safely defused outside the earth’s already saturated atmosphere while also making a cute and funny fart noise”.

The team of one hundred scientists and students hailed the experiment as a miracle, stating that this simple but effective method could save the planet from its biggest greenhouse problem, cow flatulence. 

“When we heard the first furp on the radio microphone everyone cheered with excitement, so-much-so that there was even some furps on the surface here,” MacPants added. 

However, the new method was later criticized by air traffic controllers, who pointed to the dangers of bags of cow farts floating through the skies. 

“There needs to be a warning system for cow fart bags if we are to continue down this path,” Tom Greene, an air traffic controller from Dublin airport insisted, “what if one of those bags got caught in an airplane engine, it could explode on collision, killing everyone on board, which is awful, but hilarious nonetheless”.