Families Urged To Reduce Energy Use In Bid To Ensure Data Centres Have Power They Need

AHEAD of a winter which could see rolling blackouts and further increases in the prices of household energy bills, families across Ireland have been urged to think of how all this affects their local data centre.

“Of course they’ll have vast back up generators, but think of the worry you’ll cause the site managers – do you really need to boil that kettle for your hot water bottle? Or are you being a bit selfish,” explained one data centre advocate who also happened to be the Minister for the Environment.

A glitzy media awareness campaign is being launched as part of the efforts to ensure Ireland doesn’t suffer blackouts with slogans including ‘don’t be a knob, turn off your hob’, ‘leave it another week for a shower, Jeff Bezos needs the power’ and ‘do you really need light when taking a shite?’

“But don’t focus on the negatives – while your family sits there in complete darkness you could play a great game of hide and seek, and running around will also keep you warm,” added the data centre advocate, who praised those families already reducing energy consumption due to the poverty inducing prices.

In response to Ireland being one of the only European countries who didn’t stockpile gas supplies ahead of the winter, the Taoiseach announced a civil servant would carry out a report as to why the Taoiseach’s government were forced at gunpoint to ignore all experts warning of energy issues.

“‘If only someone warned us in advance’, make sure to put that in the report,” the Taoiseach confirmed.