The Term ‘Airy Fairy’ Explained

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IN THE HEAT of cheap political point scoring politicians can sometimes speak out of turn, unthinking – they dispatch poorly pitched phrases from their gob and are forced to humbly apologise.

One such word-exchange which proved too much occurred in the Dáil yesterday when Tánaiste Leo Varadkar was offended by Michael Healy-Rae’s use of the term ‘airy fairy’.

WWN can confirm, after consulting leading linguists, jovial jousters and insult instigators, that ‘airy fairy’ is not a gay slur but in fact means someone who is not serious, not connected to reality or is lightweight and not to be taken as an intellectual peer. Therefore:

Michael Healy-Rae: “Off with you with the airy fairies and see how far it will get you. But you can be sure of one thing, it is not a nice thing to look down your nose at me”

True meaning: Fuck off.

‘Airy Fairy’ wasn’t the only phrase that caused offence in the Irish political world this week and WWN again consulted experts to explain the following:

Leo Varadkar: “When something happens in your neighbourhood, in your parish, on your estate, I think it’s only natural that you’re going to want to respond in a way that perhaps you wouldn’t if something was happening in a different part of the world”

True meaning: C’mon these aren’t Syrians, Yemenis, Afghans or Libyans. Do I have to spell it out for you? Ukrainians are our neighbours, no, not like Georgians or Albanians, forget them too.

Leo Varadkar: “Ukrainians are coming here legally”.

True meaning: It’s perfectly acceptable that it takes the Irish State five days to sort education for Ukrainian children while children in Direct Provision go months and months before receiving similar supports.

Michael Healy-Rae: “I represent the working people of Kerry”.

True meaning: I have a property portfolio of €4.7mn. I also dumped 10,000 calendars, paid for by the taxpayer, in the bin because they were missing a hyphen in my name.

Ivana Bacik: “We will aim to attract young voters to regrow the Labour Party’s base”.

True meaning: I hope to God no one under 35 has access to the internet and can search ‘Labour Party Ireland’ or retain their own memories of austerity under a coalition government Labour was part of.

The Government: “We’re doing what we can to help and house Ukrainians.”

True meaning: Suspending planning laws is on the menu boys, tell all your developer friends who won’t abuse this in any way.

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