Woulfe Just Acting The Bollocks At This Stage

136
0
Share:

THE citizens of Ireland have admitted that they’re finding it increasingly difficult to stay mad at Mr. Justice Seamus Woulfe, as his continuous avoidance of any sort of fallout from Golfgate has granted him an endearing ‘cheeky rascal’ quality that’s quite hard to hate.

“It’s hard to describe someone in his position as ‘an underdog’, but it’s starting to feel that way” said one observer, as Woulfe dodged his third appointment for a bollocking from Chief Justice Frank Clarke.

“The knives were out for Woulfe after Golfgate, with everyone looking for him to be thrown to the woulves over it… but damn it if we aren’t all starting to root for this guy!”

Although Woulfe’s continued outfoxing of the Golfgate fallout continues to tickle middle Ireland, some of his fellow attendees at the controversial Covid-shunning golf dinner have expressed dismay at the fact that they had to, quote, ‘eat shit’ end quote, for their part in the scandal.

“You mean to say I had to step down from my job as EU commisionser over a poxy salmon dinner, and all I had to do to stay employed was let the phone go to voicemail for a month?” fumed Phil Hogan, aghast at the fact that Woulfe has avoided any potential comeuppance.

“I should have known that Irish people didn’t have the attention span to stay mad at a prominent public figure for more than a fortnight. I should have waited it out. Say what you want about Woulfe, he’s a smarter man than the rest of us”.

Meanwhile, Woulfe has laid tracks for a fourth dodge of Chief Justice Clarke, citing ‘a bullock loose in the lower field’ that he has to sort out first.

Share:
X