Grim Scenes As Local Head-Melter Strikes Again


GARDAI have stated that a discovery at a Waterford house party early Sunday morning is the work of a renowned local head-melter in the area, who has seemingly reappeared on the after-hours scene after a period of being away.

A special response unit was called to disperse the gathering at a home in John’s Park, with reports suggesting the call was made by the very people throwing the party after renowned head-melter Cathal O’Rourke showed up and started wreaking havoc on everyones buzz.

The 26-year-old has already spent some time in prison after a string of incidents where he previously melted the heads off of party-goers at a series of sessions last Summer, where he allegedly forced countless victims to endure stories about himself that went absolutely nowhere.

Ian Gannin, a former friend of Mr. O’Rourke who was hosting the party on Saturday night, said he was shocked and appalled when O’Rourke showed up at his front door, just as the party was in full swing, before then inviting himself in and drinking everyone’s cans while talking an endless torrent of steaming shite.

“We can confirm that Gardai were called to a house party on Saturday where they encountered some of the most gruesome head-melting they have ever seen,” a spokesperson for Waterford Gardai confirmed.

“Upon arrival we found four instances of third degree head-melting, twelve completely wrecked heads, and an all round severe pain in the arse for every other guest, which we estimate to be in the dozens.

“We shut the event down at the request of the hosts, and told Mr. O’Rourke to go away and not annoy us”.

With head-melting being listed as a misdemeanour crime, and despite previous convictions, Mr. O’Rourke was granted bail while a file is being prepared by the DPP.

WWN urges caution if you find yourself approached by O’Rourke, as he still remains at large.