Closet Liverpool Fan Makes First Football Related Comment In Six Years


A LIVERPOOL fan has made his first football related comment in six years following the clubs ‘spectacular’ win over Cardiff City in the Carling Cup Final in Wembley yesterday.

Alan Hayes posted the emotional comment shortly after the game, and vowed to openly support the club from ‘here on in’.

The  forty-word-eulogy read: “Not a lot of ye know this but I have supported Liverpool all my life and I would just like to say to all my Man United friends ‘G’WON DA POOL!!’. WHOS FUCKING LAUGHING NOW YE SHOWER OF FUCKING CUNTS!!???”

The 28-year-old told WWN that he had been waiting six years to write a football related comment like this, but the opportunity never arose.

“I came close to posting taunting football type stuff on my Facebook page, but I learned from past mistakes to hold back until we actually won a title.”

Mr. Hayes last football related comment was sent as a group text to his Man United friends after the 2005 UEFA Champions League Final.

“This was before social networks were around so we had to text each other to get our point across.”

“I think I said something like: “I FUCKING TOLD YE WE’D DO IT YE MAN U CUNTS!!”

The son of three said he had no choice but to remain quite about his team preference for the past few years.

“People used to ask me what team I supported. I just told them I didn’t follow the game at all.”

“But now Kenny is back it’s going to be just like it used to be all those years ago when we were good.”

Alan Hayes is just one of many closet Liverpool fans to emerge from the supporter closet.

He later told WWN that he will be buying a new jersey and Martel sticker book for the new season.