Total Arsehole In Bar Asks For ‘The Usual’

KNOWN locally as a total fucking dose, Waterford man Derek Whilan has yet again entered the pub which he goes to once every three or four weeks and loudly asked the barman for ‘his usual’, leading to an awkward stand-off and the eventual ordering of ‘a pint of Guinness please’. Whilan, who thinks he’s gas,… Read more »

337 Unaccompanied Learner Drivers Seized By Gardaí

THE ROLLING out a new Department of Transport initiative spearheaded by Minister Shane Ross has seen 337 learner drivers driving without an unaccompanied driver seized by gardaí. Previously the cars of unaccompanied drivers were seized but this escalation in learner driving crackdowns will see 337 learner drivers seized and driven to an impound garage on… Read more »

“I’m Self Taught” Reveals Tambourinist Liam Gallagher

BRITISH tambourinist Liam Gallagher has revealed he has spent decades mastering his musical instrument of choice without ever receiving any lessons from an outside source, stating that being “self taught” is the key to his stunning success. In a tell-all interview with WWN, Mr. Gallagher said he used to “tap desks” in school with his fingers, before progressing to… Read more »