5 Things Not In The Mueller Report

WITH THE long awaited publication of the Mueller Report, is US Attorney General William Barr hiding something from the US public in those redacted passages? Legal scholars and experts will debate the rationale surrounding Barr’s conclusions on the report ahead of a response from Congress. But for now, we look into the 5 things not… Read more »

Hallmark Launch Dirty Uncle Day

THE world’s oldest and largest manufacturer of greeting cards has today announced a brand new day of celebration in appreciation of all the world’s dirty uncles, WWN can confirm. Dirty Uncle’s Day is due to be launched on Sunday the 7th of July to mirror similar celebrations like Mother’s and Father’s Day throughout the year. “It’s time we… Read more »

City & Spurs Play Out Drab, Joyless Draw

FOOTBALL fans have begun cancelling their TV sports packages in an act of protest and are refusing to renew their season tickets after Manchester City and Tottenham Hotspur’s Champion’s League tie resulted in a draw over two legs. Famously derided by non-fans as a boring inconsequential run around a field, the sport of football proved… Read more »

5 Worst Things Assange Did In The Ecuadorian Embassy

REPORTS have emerged surrounding the behaviour of Wikileaks founder Julian Assange during his 7-year stay in the Ecuadorian embassy in London, including instances of faecal-wall smearage, and it doesn’t stop there. Here’s 5 more anti-social things that prompted the Ecuadorians to say bye-bye and hand Assange over to UK authorities: 1) Left shavings in the… Read more »

Dublin In Mourning As No Fires Break Out At The Spire

CROWDS of inconsolable Dubliners lined the length and breadth of O’Connell Street, every one of them lost in grief as they caught sight of a perfectly intact Spire monument. A true emblem of Dublin, which conjures next to no feelings of love in the heart’s of the city’s residents, stood defiant and tall. Utterly bereft,… Read more »