The 5 Weirdest Pokemon GO! Deaths So Far

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SINCE its release earlier this month, popular monster-hunting AR sensation Pokemon GO! has racked up more deaths than malaria. Ranging from the as-you-would-expect accidents arising from wandering around looking at a phone instead of looking where you should be going, to some truly bizarre and grisly demises, the app is set to become the deadliest thing to hit the planet since the comet that wiped out the dinosaurs. Join us as we take a look at 5 of the oddest deaths so far…

1) Bowel lacerations

Following a 36 hour Pokemon hunting bender, Sicilian man Vincenzo Lamaste noticed that a wild Bulbasaur had appeared in the nearby vicinity. Wracked with exhaustion and delirium from being out in the sun for nearly two straight days, Lamaste grew frustrated at his inability to find the creature, before deciding that it must be inside him, somehow. Inserting his iPhone 6s plus into his rectum in a bid to nab the beastie, Vincenzo lacerated his large intestine and bled to death an hour later.

2) Strolled into an ISIS training camp

Huge numbers of people have met their doom playing Pokemon GO! after wandering into traffic or off the edges of cliffs, but few have been as unlucky as Muhan Dishanmeel, a 26-year-old Iraqi man who carelessly wandered into an ISIS training camp on the outskirts of his hometown while training up his Rattatta. It appears that Dishanmeel was at first welcomed by the ISIS fighters, who were themselves massive Pokemon fans, but things turned sour after Muhan beat them all in Pokecombat, leading to him getting his Pokehead cut Pokeoff.

3) Bombed by drone

Say what you want about the US drone program, it sure is inaccurate. After picking up what looked like a terrorist outside a small Afghan village, a drone pilot proceeded to blow the Pokeballs out of an unfortunate would-be Pokemon trainer. Gotta bomb em all!

4) Eaten by ducks

Although Nintendo has strongly denied claims that Psyduck has any actual psychic capabilities, there are few other explanations as to how 45-year-old Carol Harris came to be attacked by a swarm of angry ducks while catching one of the popular avian Pokemons at a pond near her Iowa home. Coincidence? We think not.

5) Brain aneurysm while writing articles about Pokemon GO!

The most recent death, which involves Pokemon GO! comes from a renowned sahiuhtirical wabsyte jounrlast that wahs writyin poke atricle then had braininjruy and then

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