Your Taxi Is Half A Mile Up The Road, Says Hailo

POPULAR taxi-hailing app Hailo would like you to know that your taxi has arrived, but will allow you to realise in your own time that it has arrived somewhere in a half-mile radius from where you originally hailed it.

The app, used by people with both a smartphone and a desire to pay money to be driven somewhere, has been used for years to summon a nearby driver to come pick you up, or at least pull up at a random house five minutes walk away.

Using the pinnacle of inaccurate GPS technology, Hailo aims to revolutionise the antiquated process of taxi acquisition; the tried and trusted “stick out your hand when you see a taxi” method which for generations had proved to be far too reliable.

Instead, Hailo users can simply tap their smartphone and watch in real-time as the app announce that “your taxi has arrived”, despite the on-screen map clearly showing the car to be four streets away.

“For ages I thought I must have a steel plate in my head or something, skewing my location on GPS,” said one Hailo user we spoke to.

“But no, it seems it’s part of the experience. You get to call a cab to come to a location that’s close to you, but not too close, that way you get a lift into town and a bit of a workout at the same time”.

Hailo aims to launch a new update later this year, which promises to make the experience even more likely to annoy you.