Shane MacGowan’s Old Teeth ‘Just Happy To Be Out Of There’

A SPOKESPERSON for Shane MacGowan’s old teeth said they’re doing well after having the singer removed from their roots in a 9 hour procedure last month.

The modest set of incisors, canines and a couple of premolars said they were just ‘glad to be out of there’, detailing the physical abuse they went through over the past 50 years.

“Whiskey, cider, paint thinners, you name it; they’ve been through it.” explained spokesman and hygienist Dr. Callan Prenderghast. “I can’t believe they lasted so long to be honest. They were in bad shape, but hopefully they can get some well deserved rest after what that animal did to them.”

MacGowan, a singer with an ongoing history of dental abuse, said he “dreaded” getting his teeth fixed despite losing most of them, making it hard to sing and even eat at times.

“They’ve been with me all me life,” MacGowan said, before joking. “Hopefully I’ll get another 50 years out of these new ones.”

A documentary which follows the restoration will air on Sky Arts over the Christmas period, for no apparent reason.