Here’s How To Avoid Looking Like A Pervert While Flying Your Drone

SO YOU’VE treated yourself to a drone mounted with a camera capable of delivering Hollywood standard HD footage from high above in the skies, but there’s only one problem; anyone flying a drone is immediately treated with an intense degree of suspicion and presumed to be a massive pervert.

You might want a beautiful overhead shot of a forest dancing in the wind, but make no mistake locals will presume you’re trying to zoom in on Mrs Neary’s back garden in the hope she’s out topless sunbathing in 5 degree heat.

Here’s how to avoid suspicion and erase any chance you’re some demented pervert:

1) Bring your child along. You’re just a lovely dad creating priceless memories, enjoying father and son time with your son.

2) What do you mean you don’t have children? What age are you at all, spending your free time in a field flying a drone?

3) It’s a hobby? For a grown man? Come off it, to be doing around here – around people’s homes? And you just enjoy flying it? Bollocks.

4) Don’t give me that ‘I didn’t know there was a school 10 miles away’ or ‘this thing only has a radius of 2km’. Don’t worry we’ve all seen the videos of perverts like you modifying the drones so they have child-catching cages attached to them.

5) Look it, you can plead all you want we’ve already called the guards on you. Make us sick so you do.