Loyalists To Protest DUP & Tories Fucking Them Over, But In Dublin For Some Reason

LOYALISTS who were led up the garden path by the DUP and the Tories over a ‘hassle free Brexit’ only to be repeatedly hit over the head with a shovel and have their wallets stolen, have announced their intention to protest this fact in Dublin of all places.

The precise reason why figures within Northern Ireland’s Loyalist communities feel the appropriate way to express their anger and dissatisfaction at having been lied to by the DUP and Westminster over a sea border and ongoing N.I protocol disruption is to head to Dublin remains a mystery to those with knowledge of the situation.

“If haunted piss-fart Jamie Bryson wants to stage a wee march in Dublin, that’s all well and good but if it’s over Unionists who were sold a pack of lies on Brexit, surely a trip to London would make more sense?” offered one person with working knowledge of geography.

“I’ve no dog in the fight myself, but I hate seeing people waste their non-petrol bomb petrol money; imagine screaming your head off about how angry you are Boris Johnson lied about the fact there would be no sea border…but outside Leinster House, ah you’d feel like a prize tit” offered another person.

Backing angry Loyalist plans to demonstrate in Dublin, DUP leader-for-now Jeffrey Donaldson said “yes, that’s it, blame the Dublin government”.

Dubliners have asked if Loyalists intend to come to the city and act in an aggressive or destructive manner, could they make sure to wreck O’Connell Street again and cause some improvements.