Increasing Number Of Men Pretending To Like Dermot Kennedy’s Music In Order To Get The Ride

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REPORTS confirm that Dermot Kennedy, like Damien Rice, Hozier and Gilbert O’Sullivan before him is now the go-to sensitive singing man of the day when it comes to men trying to get the ride.

“‘Would ya like, like, Dermot Kennedy and that, like?'” explained local young lad Stephen Taffey, revealing his go-to smooth chat up line that he thinks aids him in his pursuit of the ride, “and then if she says yeah I go ‘oh yeah, me too – I’m into that mad sensitive shit; like Johnson’s No More Tears shampoo but for the heart and that’ and the birds melt so they do”.

Sandwiched somewhere between ‘dickhead move’ and ‘ah fair play’, an increasing number of Irish men are invoking the deeply personal songs of heartache in a faux-heartfelt attempt to get someone, anyone to have a go on their mickey.

“I’m not saying his music isn’t good or anything, but I am saying I’ll be playing up how in tune I am with my emotions to women by name dropping how Giants ‘totally speaks to me’ or whatever bullshit,” confirmed self-described dead nice lad John Hallion.

Not the first musician to fall foul of having their music exploited for ride-related gains, Kennedy may follow in the footsteps of David Gray who took an injunction out against emotionally stunted Irish men using his music for such purposes.

When asked what music they pretend to like in an effort to attract the opposite sex, Irish women began laughing uncontrollably and haven’t stopped.

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