Thank God! New Covid-19 Clusters Mostly Affecting Low Paid Workers, Direct Provision & Travelling Community


A SIGNIFICANT sigh of relief was emitted by those in Ireland who, fearing the worst, thought for the briefest moment the rise in Covid-19 cases might have been affecting important people like the middle class.

With clusters reported among low paid workers, Direct Provision residents and the Travelling Community, the tension felt by genuinely important people who’s health and safety is definitely worth safeguarding evaporated with many reporting feeling a sense of welcome ease at the latest source of cases.

“Surely there’s some way to just lock all these people in one big room and let the rest of us get on with our lives? Like, you’re telling me we delayed Phase 4 for this shower of insignificants?”confirmed one well-to-do worker,

“Now, don’t get me wrong I’ll condemn and condescend to these so-called ‘vulnerable people’ being infected, but it’s still of great relief that myself and my family are insulated from all this, especially after getting back from the holiday there in Spain, could you imagine picking up Covid-19 from these cretins? Obviously you’d sue them, but the inconvenience of it all,” confirmed one middle class man who just zones out of news reports pleading the case of low-paid and exposed workers.

Pressed further on their self-centred and myopic attitude to the latest clusters, those not among the affected groups stated “don’t be ridiculous, my son’s in the same class as a government TD’s son, that’d never happen” when asked how they would react to people calling for them to be locked up away somewhere.