Queen Flown At Half Mast As Brexit Descends Into Further Chaos

Facebook Share Share
Twitter Share
Flipboard Share
Reddit Share

AHEAD of her speech to the British parliament, the Queen will be flown at half mast to signify the grave and ever worsening circumstances surrounding Brexit and the chaos wrought by the Boris Johnson government.

The Queen became only the second British monarch to be flown at half mast; the first being King Edward III, who was erected halfway during the Black Death to mark the deaths of millions of people, and more importantly to keep the monarch out of harms way.

“I think she looks kind of cute up there,” said one Londoner, “it’s just a shame her skirt keeps blowing over her head like that, it’s kinda degrading”.

The Queen will be kept perched atop the flag pole as part of the ceremonial practice until such a time as things improve and Brexit stops resembling a script for the sequel to ‘Joker’, meaning the Queen could be up there indefinitely.

“At least with the Queen that high up a flagpole, Boris can’t possibly repeatedly lie to her face again,” concluded one Johnson aide desperately trying to stop the PM from placing a ladder on the flagpole flying the queen.

ONE MORE THING: Our articles have been free for the past 10 years and will remain so for the foreseeable future. We've since launched an exclusive service for sound fuckers to donate a price of a fancy coffee per month in return for a whole new tier of quality satire. So please, give our small team some support, you absolute legend. Thanks.

Signing up is easy and done HERE.
Comments ( 1 )
Share what you think.