Good Luck Figuring Out The Source Of This Meltdown, Screams Toddler


THE parents of currently-shrieking Waterford tot Eddie Henlan have admitted that they are utterly clueless as to why he started bawling out of nowhere, and are now adopting a ‘wait and see’ approach to the situation which continues to worsen as we speak.

Meanwhile, 18-month-old Eddie has confided to WWN that his parents attempts to placate him are ‘adorable’, while keeping schtum about just exactly what it is that caused him to go into ‘full meltdown mode’ during preparations for a trip to his Nan’s house.

Playing his adorably small cards close to his adorably small chest, self-confessed little dote Henlan is continuing to bawl his face off as his parents frantically attempt to feed him, change him, provide him with his favourite toys and soothers, give him a bottle of milk and check the tightness levels of all cuffs and sleeves on the garments he’s wearing, all the while not even coming close to the ‘true reason’ as to why the baby went from ‘happy child’ to ‘call Tusla’ in the blink of an eye.

“I mean, it’s nice to run them through their paces every so often,” said Henlan, watching his mam Eileen and his dad Jake run around the house looking for the yellow dummy, as if that’s going to make a fucking bit of difference.

“So every so often I’ll just wig the F out, you know what I mean? Just go from placid, quiet little child into The Omen at the drop of a hat. Look at them ‘oh, has he wind? Does he have a tooth coming up? Did he drop crumbs down his vest and they’re itching him?’… lads, keep guessing. I’m taking the secret of this with me to the cot”.

UPDATE: As quick as he started, young Henlan has ceased crying, leaving his parents none the wiser as to what solved the problem, let alone what started it.