“I’d Usually Go Through Several Burners In A Week” Garda Commissioner Defends Missing Phone

GARDA Commissioner Noirín O’Sullivan has told the tribunal investigating an alleged smear campaign against Garda whistleblower Sergeant Maurice McCabe that she usually goes through several burners a week, and has no idea where the phone she used during that period is at this moment.

“I’d usually go through five, sometimes six blowers a week,” she said, breaking a sim card in half and swallowing it, “How do you expect me to still have a phone from 3 years ago? That mobile number is well gone at this stage. I don’t leave trails like that, what do you think I am, an amateur?”

O’Sullivan’s comments come after opposition TDs demanded an explanation as to how the crucial evidence, along with another mobile phone belonging to former Garda commissioner Martin Callinan, has somehow gone missing, raising fears that the head of An Garda Síochána maybe purposely trying to cover her, and her predecessors tracks.

“I would never use the same phone for more than a day,” the Commissioner again defended, before then referring to a recent investigation which proved Garda intelligence listened into thousands of innocent peoples calls, “sure you wouldn’t know who’d be listening into my calls at the station. The lads are always eavesdropping into people’s conversations for the craic, so I said best to do what the criminals do – burn the sim when done. Innit bruv?”

The news of the missing phones comes exactly two years after Supt Dave Taylor was arrested for the alleged leaking of information to the media, which also saw his phone seized on the orders of Commissioner O’Sullivan’s own husband, Detective Chief Supt Jim MacGowan, which is still in the possession of the Gardaí.

“That’s a shame now that all the phones needed for this tribunal are either missing or in lock up, looks like I’m here for another while,” the Commissioner concluded.