North Korea Continues Missile Assault On Sea


THE KOREAN Central News Agency has issued a statement in which it has praised the country’s military for a decisive strike on the body of water between itself and Japan, claiming to have knocked out several key shoals of fish as well as creating “an enormous splash worthy of a king”.

Dubbed “Operation Hit The Water”, North Korea launched two ballistic missiles yesterday, with a 50% success rate. The other missile exploded on launch, with sources close to the North Korean military expressing that this was “exactly what we wanted it to do”.

With North Korea now launching 1 successful missile strike against the Sea of Japan every 19 months or so, many believe it is only a matter of years before the country are ready to take aim at something that isn’t a huge, empty space.

“Our Glorious Leader has struck a hammer blow against our enemy, water,” beamed the newsreader for the CNA.

“Kim Jong-un has once again shown that he is the man to protect us from waves, fish, plankton and kelp. Our missiles hit the 977,980 km² area target, exactly as we planned. Nothing can stop North Korea. We can hit any sea we want, as long as it is directly to our border and the wind is in our favour”.

The celebrations continue as the one boat owned by the North Korean navy travels to the impact site to retrieve the missile for use later in the year.