Waterford Mother Brings Out The Good Biscuits For Visiting Relatives


BLOWING the three inches of dust off the family’s tin of USA biscuits, otherwise known as the ‘good biscuits’, Waterford mother, Henrietta Callaghan caused a ripple of shock amongst her children as they watched in disbelief.

Household legend had it that the biscuits had been purchased sometime in the last decade, on the off chance the Pope might visit.

“Mam, are you alright, what are you doing?” Cormac, Henrietta’s eldest queried, worried at the sight of his mother climbing on a chair to reach the tin of biscuits on top of the press – long established as ‘off limits’ to everyone in the house.

Citing the exceptional circumstances of relatives visiting all the way from America, the 59-year-old mother-of-four explained that sufficiently fancy enough company were descending on the household to warrant use of the 1 kilo box.

Henrietta’s second cousins from Chicago, Averil and Anna, were to be the first recipient of biscuits long thought by the Callaghan to be too good for normal, everyday mortals.

Pointing several times to the ‘USA’ writing etched on the front of the tin, the Waterford mother observed that her cousins “were probably sick of them, what with them being everywhere in the US I’m sure”, before being informed by Anna, much to Henrietta’s shock, that they’re not available in America.

“It says here ‘best before 2011′ Mam,” daughter Ailbhe said, trying to get her mother’s attention, but was instead batted away by Henrietta using a series of dramatic and dismissive hand gestures.

A strict policy of 1 biscuit per Callaghan child was strictly enforced during the cousins’ visit.

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