Banking Inquiry Report Confirms The ECB Are A Pack Of Cunts


THE Banking Inquiry report, which is to be published in full today will conclude that the ECB are a pack of cunts, WWN has learned.

Citing an ultimatum given to the Government in March 2011, in which they were instructed by the ECB not to ‘burn the bondholders’ or face the threat of having the emergency funding Irish banks were in receipt of being completely withdrawn.

“We stand by our conclusion, them lot threatening to bankrupt a country all over again just so you can keep a few rich lending institutions rich is classic cunt behaviour,” said one member of the inquiry committee.

While no definition of what constitutes a cunt can be found in the report, it is presumed the inquiry used the traditional appraisal, assessing whether the ECB had the requisite level of selfishness, repugnancy, underhandedness and aggression normally associated with cunts, alongside the presence of a punchable face.

“We don’t take the conclusions lightly, you can’t just call the ECB a bunch of cunts unless the facts back it up, and holding a country to ransom sort of hits the prick nail on the cunt head,” another inquiry member concluded.

The inquiry also found that the Central Bank at the time was completely asleep on the job, suffering a near fatal bout of narcolepsy.

Experts analysing the report, which is available to the public to read, have already confirmed the conclusions reached will result in no meaningful action whatsoever.