Homeless Man Finds Only Known Copy Of Fine Gael’s Five Point Plan In Skip



A DUBLIN native has found the only known copy of Fine Gaels Five Point Plan in a city centre skip this morning, raising questions as to why it was discarded by the Government in the first place.

Homeless man James ‘Jimbo’ Cunningham said he was searching through the dumpster for recyclables when he came across the government document.

“They were gutting out a run down bar on the quay so I said to myself I’d have a mooch around the skip to see if I could salvage some scrap.” recalled Cunningham, who lost his home and job due to the recession in 2008. “I picked up this stained booklet with a Fine Gael stamp on it and thought nothing of it at first. Then when I brought it to a local second hand shop they said I had found the elusive five point plan!”

The Fine Gael strategy was last seen in 2011, when the political party was running for election, but disappeared shortly after they were elected into government.

The only known copy of the plan, which promised job creation and political reform, was believed to have been lost by a member of the party in early 2012, but the incident was kept secret to not embarrass the individual involved.

A spokesperson for Fine Gael stated today that, although the plan was lost along the way initially, “significant progress has been made”.

“We’ve had to implement the plan from the top of our heads.” said the spokesperson. “Until now we’ve managed to remember 3 main points out of the five – which is a majority when you think about it. Luckily we can focus on the other two now that the plan has been found by Mr. Cunningham.”

“We were all kicking ourselves when we found out what the other two plans were.” he added. “Healthcare reform and Politics taking the lead! How could we have forgotten them? ”

The government is expected to continue the plan as of today.