Zlatan Ibrahimovic Set To Deliver Pre-Match Team Talk To Ireland
SWEDEN’S infamous striker Zlatan Ibrahimovic was at the centre of a fresh controversy earlier today at Giovanni Trapattoni’s final press conference before Ireland’s crunch tie against Sweden.
The imperious Ibrahimovic gate-crashed the packed press conference as he waded through a sea of journalists lifting several people out of their chairs as they blocked his path.
This latest stunt follows the Swede’s breaking in to the Aviva stadium yesterday evening to ‘mark his territory’, 42 security personnel and Gardaí.
Hushed terror descended on the press conference as Zlatan approached the Irish manager and whispered menacingly in his ear. Trapattoni, in his broken-english-best, delivered the news that the Swedish striker would be delivering the pre-match team talk to the Irish team.
While Zlatan would not go into the contents of the speech he will deliver this evening, he did however, describe in lurid detail the various ways in which he plans to harm and humiliate the Irish squad.
Several people in attendance at the press conference vomited and Manuela Spinelli, Trapattoni’s translator, fainted.
Zlatan finished up the Irish manager’s press conference by informing the public the kick off would take take place at 8.30 p.m rather than 7.45 p.m as “Zlatan will be eating in the Burdocks, to see what the fuss is about”.
He also thanked “the men of Ireland for the use of their women” before screaming “Zlatan smash!”