Government Send Traveller Carpet Salesman To ‘Renegotiate’ Bail Out Deal

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John Anthony Connors will travel to Brussels on Wednesday where he will meet German Chancellor Angela Merkell for ‘talks’.IN a last ditch effort to relieve Ireland’s massive banking debt, the government have decided to send a traveller carpet salesman to renegotiate deal terms with the EU.

The Wexford based traveller, who has 44 years experience in haggling and negotiating costs, was chosen after successfully selling  fourteen carpets to Labour leader Eamon Gilmore last week for €3,000.

“I didn’t even need the carpets. He was very persistent though.” said the Tánaiste

Mr Connors was later contacted by a member of the labour party on Saturday morning to arrange a meeting with the Taoiseach.

The 50-year-old drove up to Dáil Eireann this morning, parking his 07 Ford Transit van on the foothpath outside Leinster house, causing some disruption to pedestrians.

A spokesperson for the Taoiseach told WWN that an agreement had been met between the government and Mr. Connors in relation to his future employment as a state negotiator.

“John Anthony had several conditions to his contract, including planning permission for a halting site on Kiliney hill in Dublin and a small herd of piebalt pony’s.”

The agreement was signed at 12 noon today and it is believed the carpet sales man will take part in a crash course in the banking debt. He is expected to drive to Brussels tomorrow morning from Dun Laoghaire port with his wife and fourteen children.

Government sources feel that this will be Ireland’s only hope at renegotiating the banking debt, but have full faith in Mr.Connors’ ability to haggle.

Taoiseach Enda Kenny commented earlier saying: ‘If John Anthony can’t do it, nobody can’.

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