So You’ve Just Handed The Barman A Rolled Up €50, Here’s What Happens Next

FOR some unknown reason you’ve just handed the barman in your local pub a rolled up €50 note creating a very awkward moment between you and him for reasons we won’t go into right now, so WWN has put together this handy go-to guide to help you explain yourself.

“Sorry, I use rolled up notes instead of paper straws for my drinks as it’s better for the environment.”

Making this about the environment is a brilliant option as bars continue to try push paper straws on their customers. €50 notes have a film over them making them impervious to liquids, so this brilliant excuse is sure to work on anyone. Tell them that the countless DNA on the notes from previous handlers also strengthens your immune system. Who nose [sic] you may even start a trend.

“Found this in the toilet mate, I’d say someone lost it if you want to ask around.”

A lovely little switcheroo here; pretend you’re handing in the lost and now found note instead of paying for drinks with it. Your honesty will shine through and your local barman will respect you more. NOTE: Make sure to clean off your bank card if you now have to tap for your drinks order.

“Those bloody kids again. Sorry about that pal, they’re always playing with my money”.

You know how kids are, always playing around with units of currency, making strange shapes. Origami they call it or something. If it keeps them off the tablets for two minutes what harm. I swear they’re bloody addicted to the things. You know yourself.

“Okay, I was snorting a big fat one off the cistern in the disabled jacks and forgot to unroll the note. Sure look, say nothing. Give me four Jagers there and a can of red bull and one for yourself, lad. Sound!”

Sometimes honesty is the best policy.